She is British, however she claims that she was forced out of Europe by the Italian government. I know she is very wealthy because she wears a $20,000 Rolex and comes down into our lobby everyday with a different Chanel handbag. She gives $20 to anybody who is willing to listen to her mindless, bi-polar ramblings for more than 5 minutes. However to me, the $20 is not worth dealing with the craziness.
On her first day in New York, she came into the hotel crying uncontrollably because someone bumped into her on the streets of Times Square. Then, last night she asked me to get her a cab that would "not speak to her at all or else she would just lose it." I found a cab driver and explained to him, "look man, this lady is fucking CRAZY! If you can get her to 33rd st. and 8th avenue without saying a word she will gladly pay you the fare and probably give you a nice tip." He agreed and within five minutes she was storming back in to the hotel, furious, at me no less.
"You need to find me a better cab driver, that guy was a nightmare!" She said to me. "I forgot my wallet and my purse in my room and he wasn't willing to drive me there. Find me a better cab when I come down!"
"OK" I said dumbfounded. "I will find you better driver." I ended up just putting her in the first cab I could find and wished him the best of luck. No matter what gets done for this woman, she will find something wrong with it.
This morning as I was arriving into work, I come to find out that she has been crying in the restaurant talking about how horrible the world has become and screaming about how today was the anniversary of the London subway bombings. I ended up hiding in the locker room until I found out that she had left the building for the day.
As the day progressed more and more of my co-workers told stories of how her craziness had affected them during her brief stay with us. We nick named her "The Polar Bear" on account of her violent, bi-polar mood swings. On our radios "Code Polar Bear" means she is arriving and to run for cover if you don't want to be yelled at for 20 minutes. A more competent management team would realize what a nuisance this woman is and ask her to leave the hotel. However, since our management team is completely clueless, I get the benefit of witnessing this mountain of pure gold writing material unveil it's fruits to me first hand.
I have the next two days off but I work the morning shift on Sunday when she is scheduled to check out. Personally, I hope she stays forever. I could write a fucking book based only on the crazy shit this woman says!
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