Willie Bass!

So I work with this cat who calls himself Willie Bass. Willie Bass is a Puerto Rican man in his mid 40's who has been born and raised in the Bronx. He smokes a pack of Newports a day, at least a gram of weed a day and has a deep and raspy voice that sounds exactly like the Kool-Aid Man. In fact, for a period of time in the 90's, he actually landed a contract to be the voice of the Kool-Aid Man and recorded several commercials that aired nationally. This was before he was the road manager for C&C Music Factory. 

Basically the guy is hilarious and it's always a pleasure getting to work with him and listen to his stories about growing up in New York and being on the road with C&C. There was also a period in time when he was the personal driver for Jerry Seinfeld. I am convinced that should he ever decide to write his memoirs, it will be a national best seller! The guy can tell you stories and make you laugh for 8 hours straight. I know this for a fact!

Anyway, one summer day about two years ago, Willie Bass and I were busy outside working on the streets of Times Sq. I was unloading bags out of the back of a car that had just arrived and Willie was in the street hailing a cab by whistling his famous ear piercing whistle. The girls from the front desk were pestering us on the radio to come inside because people needed to retrieve their luggage inside.

"I copy that" I say. "We are both busy outside, we will be inside in just a moment. Copy?"

No response from the front desk. The front desk agents at our hotel use the 2-way radio as a 1-way radio. They keep the radios on but with the volume all the way down so we can hear them but they can't hear us.

"Bellman, we need help with luggage retrieval at the desk." Natasha at the front desk says.

"COPY!" I say, very frustrated. "Give us a minute!!"

Just then, as I hand the valet ticket to the couple that just arrived and invite them to go check in at the front desk, a cab comes speeding down the street. As he inches closer to the hotel I notice that he is getting very close to Willie Bass who is still trying to find a vacant cab for our other guests. The cab pulls in so fast and close that he runs over Willie's foot.

"Awwww Shit!" Willie exclaims! "That cabbie just ran me down! Make sure he don't go nowhere!!!" 

A middle eastern man in a Turban hops out of the driver side door and runs over to Willie. He says to him in a thick accent:

"What were you doing in the middle of the street? This is your fault!"

"Fuck you man!" Willie shoots right back. "You ran over my foot, how am I gonna make my money now man? I'm gonna sue your middle eastern ass!"

The cabbie suddenly becomes very defensive. "NO! It's OK. Here take my moneys, don't sue, don't sue!"

By this time Willie has dragged himself over to the curb of the hotel and is sitting on it while lighting up a Newport and unlacing his shoe.

"What? I got money motherfucka" he says pulling a wad of his tips for the day out of his right pocket. "I don't need your dirty money, it's the principle of the matter! I'm gonna take you down!"

By this time security has come out of the building and I quickly escort the guests away from the scene of the accident and inside to our air-conditioned lobby. Police reports were filed and Willie took a little time off of work to rehab his foot. He got a settlement from the cab company about a year later but it was only for like $5,000. 

I got a great story out of the whole scenario. I will never forget that day for as long as I live!