Now, it comes with the territory in my line of work that you have to deal with some pretty cheap people on a daily basis. Sometimes the cheapest people you deal with, are the ones with the most money. For instance, my friend used to work at a upscale hotel in Midtown and Dwight Freeney of the Indianapolis Colts was staying at the hotel. During his stay Mr. Freeney requested a very rare and expensive bottle of tequila be sent to his room. Knowing this man was a V.I.P. the hotel managers made several calls and finally located a bottle of the rare agave drink in a liquor store the lower east side. They called the football player to let them know they had located a bottle of the tequila in the city and that it would be comped and delivered to his room within the hour. They gave a bellman money for the bottle and cab fare and sent him downtown to go pick it up. About a half hour later he returned with the bottle and delivered it the the defensive lineman's suite. The mammoth athlete arrived at the door with and accepted the bottle from the bellman with a thank you and a $3 tip!!!
A $3 TIP!!!!!! This is a guy who signed a 6 year, $72 million contract in 2007 with a $30 million signing bonus. Now I'm sure taxes are a bitch but I'm also pretty sure that a guy making $12 million a year can afford more than a $3 tip. I have found that professional athletes, for the most part, are pretty bad tippers considering the money that they make. This story of a cheap NFL athlete, while shocking and absurd, has nothing on what happened to me last week.
At the Times Square Marriot Marquis last week, there was a big convention for hospitality industry. All the big wigs of the hotel business throughout the country were in town, including the CEO from my company's home office in San Francisco. The man is know as Leon Khackiss and after a week of free hotel rooms and comped meals in New York City, it was time for this mogul of business (who I happen to know for a fact makes an easy 7 figures a year) to check out of his hotel room. My "kiss ass" of a general manager, Rufus Benniss, arranged for a beautiful 2011 cranberry colored Masarati to pick him up and take him to the airport. As the car arrived with his name in the passenger side window, Mr. Khackiss was shocked and surprised at the ride. He had no idea that my GM had set it up and thanked me for arranging the car. Since I didn't have any knowledge at the time that Rufus had arranged for the car either, I took credit for it.
"Wow, what a beautiful car." Leon said with a big smile on his face. "Thank you so much Dylan."
"No problem Mr. Khackiss sir." I said back to him. "I'm glad we could send you back home in style."
As I open the door for him, my co-worker Soo-Soo grabs his bags and puts them in the trunk. Leon pulls out his wallet and as he flips through several $20 and $100 bills, he stops and pulls out two $1 bills and says to us:
"I know it's very meek. I know it's very meager, but spread the wealth." As he says this he takes one of the bills in each hand and gives it to each one of us individually. As we accept the shitty tips with a look of shock on our faces, he hops in his free Masarati to head back to his beautiful home in the bay area.
Now, let's just analyze the situation for a second. This man is the CEO of a major hotel company. He makes over a million dollars each year, plus bonuses, and stays at all of his properties for free. His meals are comped as are his rides to and from the airport. I'm pretty sure his airplane tickets are free also (or at least tax deductible.) The only expenses he incurs on these business trips are personal shopping and tips. To top it off, we are HIS employees! He is making upwards of 25x my annual income and he can't even take care of his own people. It's not like $10-$20 would send his life into a tailspin. He is familiar with the industry and knows damn well that tipped employees get paid less than all other employees at the hotel. In addition, he knows damn well how fucking expensive it is to live in a city like New York. He must have some sort of concept that the doormen and bellmen who work at every hotel of his depend on tips to pay their rent and buy their groceries (and drugs and alcohol as well.)
I can tolerate a European man giving me a dollar for bringing his family to their rooms when they check in or for grabbing them a taxi and loading up their bags when they check out because they simply don't know any better. However, for the CEO of of my hotel's corporate office to tip $1 is so fucking insulting that I don't even know how to fully express my frustration. I hope I've done a semi-decent job of it here.
I hope someone out there feels my pain!
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